Update:
Comic Cons are now a thing for Carl. Be sure to check out his caricatures on the CARLucopia page.
Carl will be seeking more caricatures at the Cherry City Comicon in Salem Oregon on April 30 and May 1, 2016.
Comic Cons are now a thing for Carl. Be sure to check out his caricatures on the CARLucopia page.
Carl will be seeking more caricatures at the Cherry City Comicon in Salem Oregon on April 30 and May 1, 2016.
Bovine Conspiracy
Since chickens remain silent on the issue, I guess it is pigs, once again, who must do the dirty work.
Why is it that pigs and chickens bear the brunt of the breakfast burden? The most “important meal of the day” is nearly always devoid of our bovine brethren. Ham & eggs, bacon & eggs, sausage & eggs, is anybody noticing a pattern here? Sure, there are also steak & eggs but those dang cows have cleverly inoculated themselves from the charge of conspiracy by being “included” in “common” breakfast fare - but the boutique pricing of steak effectively excludes them from any meaningful participation. When did cows get so smart? Are they acting alone? Why aren’t the media focused on this?
Price alone is not the issue here. I’m not that naïve. Sure pork and poultry products are a low price alternative to steak. But let’s not overlook the cheaper cuts. I speak of hamburger, of course. Where are the breakfast hamburgers, stew meat & miscellaneous gristle products?
It is high time that cows shoulder their share of America’s most important meal.
Carl
Why is it that pigs and chickens bear the brunt of the breakfast burden? The most “important meal of the day” is nearly always devoid of our bovine brethren. Ham & eggs, bacon & eggs, sausage & eggs, is anybody noticing a pattern here? Sure, there are also steak & eggs but those dang cows have cleverly inoculated themselves from the charge of conspiracy by being “included” in “common” breakfast fare - but the boutique pricing of steak effectively excludes them from any meaningful participation. When did cows get so smart? Are they acting alone? Why aren’t the media focused on this?
Price alone is not the issue here. I’m not that naïve. Sure pork and poultry products are a low price alternative to steak. But let’s not overlook the cheaper cuts. I speak of hamburger, of course. Where are the breakfast hamburgers, stew meat & miscellaneous gristle products?
It is high time that cows shoulder their share of America’s most important meal.
Carl
McRib is Back!
Words that chill the soul of every honest pig in the country. McDonald’s restaurants step up their perpetual persecution of poor Porcine Americans. A vast procession of noble swine march to the slaughterhouses in order to fill the empty bellies of obese Americans from Maine to California. Even chickens & cows stand idly by while the holocaust of pork goes on before their very eyes. The price of America’s fast food vice is paid in porcine blood.
When will the vegans of this country rise up and right this tragic wrong? Are they without backbone? Are they worthless and weak? While those sad, lettuce-munchers leisurely pick roughage from their teeth, their favorite omnivores are being consumed patty by patty. As a downtrodden minority we must rely on the action of others and suffer with their inaction.
Yes, McRib is back. And the vegans order McSalad. The slaughter continues.
Carl
When will the vegans of this country rise up and right this tragic wrong? Are they without backbone? Are they worthless and weak? While those sad, lettuce-munchers leisurely pick roughage from their teeth, their favorite omnivores are being consumed patty by patty. As a downtrodden minority we must rely on the action of others and suffer with their inaction.
Yes, McRib is back. And the vegans order McSalad. The slaughter continues.
Carl
Farm Conspiracy
The conspiracy likely goes far deeper than just the chickens.
The subtle signs are glimpsed only by those few who eschew sloth. Sadly most of my porcine peers grow fat and lazy always chasing short term gain while spurning long term improvement. The barnyard is enveloped in a dire aura. There is something ahoof.
Central to my suspicions is the farmer - detached, superior, industrious. He has always been a mysterious enabler. Even with acres and acres of land available for foraging, we have been supplied with food, water, shelter and healthcare - in exchange for our freedom. Dependency is all but complete. Only I remain as a standout to this unfathomable altruism. Only I venture beyond the immediate trough area for food and exercise.
Lately his generosity has grown more profound. The amount of feed has increased. My peers are growing fat at an alarming rate. If altruism is truly his sole purpose, then how does gross obesity figure in? The farmer’s motives remain unclear. And until I can unravel that mystery I will not rest.
Carl
The subtle signs are glimpsed only by those few who eschew sloth. Sadly most of my porcine peers grow fat and lazy always chasing short term gain while spurning long term improvement. The barnyard is enveloped in a dire aura. There is something ahoof.
Central to my suspicions is the farmer - detached, superior, industrious. He has always been a mysterious enabler. Even with acres and acres of land available for foraging, we have been supplied with food, water, shelter and healthcare - in exchange for our freedom. Dependency is all but complete. Only I remain as a standout to this unfathomable altruism. Only I venture beyond the immediate trough area for food and exercise.
Lately his generosity has grown more profound. The amount of feed has increased. My peers are growing fat at an alarming rate. If altruism is truly his sole purpose, then how does gross obesity figure in? The farmer’s motives remain unclear. And until I can unravel that mystery I will not rest.
Carl